Thursday, January 20, 2011

Broken Innocence

Happy new year! I've been away for a while and could not just get a system to browse. Well, now I'm back; and God helping me, I'll keep pouring out my undiluted thoughts into this blog.
A while back, a friend of mine informed me about another friend's wedding (a lot of my friends seem to be getting married this year by the way), and I was so excited. I started making plans on how I'd get to Nigeria in order to attend this my friend's wedding and all of a sudden, a nagging thought kept coming back to my head, 'well, they didn't attend yours, why bother?'. I kept battling with this thought and I mentioned it to my husband (considering that he'd be handling my expenses anyway), and he said, 'you have no obligation'.
But I felt so unsettled when I made the decision that I wasn't going. My mind kept going to my daughter... hold that thought...
Okay, another scenario is calling people to say 'happy birthday' or texting, or not saying anything at all. I realised that i had developed the horrible habit of calling those who called me, and texting those who texted me... and for those who don't bother, hmm, I still call or text depending on my mood.
When did life get this complicated? When did we grow to a stage where we had to repay everyone in their own currency?
I look at my child's attitude right now, and at 15 months, she throws tantrums if she doesn't get her way, she plays a lot, takes risks like climbing furnitures, opening the ovens etc.
Anytime she does not get her way or I take 'something' I perceive to be dangerous away from her, or I make her unhappy, she starts crying. But do you know the interesting thing? She still comes to me amidst the tears to cuddle her! Now, that's the heart of a baby!
Learns to let go of past hurts immediately, does not mete evil for evil!
Life is so much simpler that way.
I'm not perfect... In fact, I battle with most of these thoughts a lot.
But, I'm learning. And I'm sharing this with those who might have been hurt by someone. And you are in a dilemma as to whether to spend their currency, or just yours, or better still, Christ's currency... I believe God ultimately wants us to develop that childlike innocence, where, you take everyone as they come and expect them to hurt you. And when they do, 'dust' yourself and move on. Don't hold on and become a bitter, and angry person (no one likes such and you are just hurting yourself). Leave the past behind and open your arms wide towards the person.
Life is beautiful. Live it without restrictions.
P.S: Temilolu, thanks so much for reminding me about blogging!


  1. This is really lovely. Inasmuch as we try to spend Christ's currency, we still feel compelled to give them theirs but what will it profit us anyways? Think on theses things. Thanks for this beautiful post, may ur ink & God's inspiration in u never go dry.

  2. Every blog keeps blessing my heart.Unforgiveness hurts the giver more than the reciever...i pray for grace to nurture a childlike innocence that may appear foolish to man but desirable to God

  3. @Titi, thanks a millioon for dropping by. Amen to that and thanks dear!
    @Anonymous, true! Thanks a bunch!